Near-death Experience: Childhood Introduction
My first loss of vital signs due to the heart condition was at the age of six in 1966. This began the mystery of my life when (in 1978) all the past childhood experiences were swept aside and buried in my unconscious. I didn't have direct access to the bulk of the memories of my childhood again - until 2009. I had sworn out a promise to an eyewitness to my 1978 near death experience that I wouldn't talk about my 'other worldly' trip to the other side publicly - until I recovered my memories from childhood again. In 1978, it was as if I had been reborn into my body again to started a new life with a new mind. I often referred to my childhood as my 'past life.'
I had died in 1978. My spirit left this world. This was a fact for me. It wasn't something I could convince everyone of and gave up trying after a while. For what ever reason, my childhood was a complete and total mystery to me during the bulk of my adult life. It was a shocked to my mind and my senses when I started recalling exactly how many times my spirit departed the body and left this world.
As an adult - I have a whole new perspective and profound appreciation for the experiences.
My adult life was divided by that invisible line that existed at the age of 18. I could recall vivid details about my near death experience at the age of 18, yet a large portion of the details were hidden away in an unconscious format. It was a vast mystery to my adult mind. I couldn't image trying to ponder the reality that having such experiences was a daily, weekly or monthly occurrence in my childhood as my family member and several Doctors had claimed.
My Dad was the first to tell me,
"Son, you died over a 1000 times when you was a child and lived to tell about each one of them. We could never figure out what the heck you were talking about then. What makes you think this latest death your trying to tell us about is any different from the other thousand times you trying to relate to us what you went through on the other side? You just spoke in riddles that confused us more than it gave us any understanding."
It took me twenty years of 'forgetfulness' toward my childhood before i started scratching the surface of what laid below and hidden in the unconscious mind about those mystical and spiritual trips outside of my human body into the spiritual realm of the afterlife.
The reason I used riddles in childhood was because the trip into the light was beyond words. The riddles were my attempt to formulate 'parables.' As a child, I didn't have a vast vocabulary to draw upon. Now that I have gone through the tunnel of forgetfulness and accumulated a vast vocabulary of words - and came out of on the other side, the core problem hasn't changed.
It is beyond words. There is here and there is there. There is beyond physical so there are not words in our vocabulary that have a direct meaning that it has 'there.'
Over there - words are NOT used to express, share or distribute 'knowledge' or 'understanding.' In the afterlife realm - I called it the 'language of the inner heart' which is beyond words for the mind to hold. Only the inner heart (spirit) was vast enough to carry the weight and measure of the mystical concepts relating to 'spiritual and eternal life.'
As a child, I learned that here (in the physical world of time) words often led a mind toward deception. Words could and would deceive or minds from a truth that was hidden and buried in our own inner hearts of understanding. As a child - I witnessed this as a fact over and over again. I felt this world was a battleground as two forces battled it out within the 'unseen' spiritual realm that surrounded the physical realm at all times. I learned what 'blindness' meant when I walked with 'inner sight' to spirits that walked the earth. I witnessed the 'inner spirit' of the people around me - as well as spirits that plagued the minds of many people though torment, misery and deceit.
Through my childhood I was in search for the secrets that led to 'inner harmony' and contentment as opposed to 'disharmony and discontentment.' For me, (as a child) it wasn't about looking for 'peace' on the other side in the afterlife - after physical life. For me - it was about understanding the mystery of living in this world with 'inner peace.' For me, it was not something given to you on the other side as much as it was something you had to give to yourself on this side.
On these pages, I will try and write the stories relating to my childhood 'near death experiences' and the lessons I felt I struggled with to find inner peace to walk with here in this world. It wasn't easy but I finally figured out the riddle that went along with ancient teachings that have been in the world of man for 2000 years.